Let's face it, it's hard being a teen nowadays. If you throw religion into the mix, especially a religion that probably isn't embraced by the majority of the people around you, things become a lot more difficult. Your parents may tell you it's just a phase, your friends may call you psycho, and adults who you were on friendly terms with before may now tell you you're going to burn in hell. Don't despair; you will survive. But how? I'll give you some tips below based on things I've read and my own less than wonderful experiences growing up. I'm an adult now, and out on my own where my religion isn't as big an issue as it once was. It may seem like a long way off, but I made it, and so can you.

I'm sure that if you've just discovered Wicca, you're pretty excited. Things that were once cast in doubt have now become crystal clear. I'm sure you'll want to share your new insights with everybody around you, or at least a few close friends. My advice is this: Don't. At least, not right away. Too many people out there have skewed notions of what Wicca and witchcraft are, and blurting out things, when you've only just begun your journey, that you may not fully understand, can sometimes hurt your case later. First impressions are everything.

This applies to even your inner circle of friends, as well. You may think you can trust them with anything, that they'll think you're cool because you're a witch now, and that because you've never discussed religion before, that it won't be a big deal now. People are cruel, especially to those perceived as being different - that's you in this case. Long-time friends may suddenly turn on you, either because their parents find out and tell them that you're evil, or simply because they don't want to be left off the bandwagon.

This is what happened to me. I told someone at school that I thought I could trust with my life, and before lunch time, the entire school knew. It brought the Bible-thumpers out of the woodwork. Suddenly a Bible study group was allowed to form at the school, despite the possible violation of the Establishment Clause, prohibiting our government, and all government-funded agencies (public schools are definitely included in this category), from establishing a certain religion as dominant. I had swastikas drawn on my locker in permanent marker, I had things thrown at me in lunch, I found disgusting pictures depicting animal sacrifice and bloodshed stuffed into my books, and one brazen soul shoved one such picture into my hand as they walked past in the hallway. It didn't stop there. I couldn't go anywhere without being whispered about or harassed, in school or out. It was useless to try and deny that I was Wiccan - the cat was already out of the bag.

So please, for your own sanity, learn as much as you can before you say anything, and be very careful about it even then. Sound people out before you bare your soul to them. Give them honest answers, and do not bash their religion, just because they might bash yours.

What happens if your parents find out, and ask you about it? This is definitely not the place to lie to your parents, or tell half-truths. Chances are, they already know more than they're letting on, and they're just seeing if you'll be honest about it. If they ask, tell them honestly how you feel and why. Don't get defensive; this will only make matters worse. If you're still in the exploring stages, tell them so. Reassure them that Wicca is not about killing animals and casting evil spells on people. Tell them about the Law of Three, and how it's similar to the Golden Rule. If you have any books on the subject, allow them to read them. (I know this is probably the last thing you'd want to do, but seeing words in print may carry more weight with them than your word.) If they're asking, they care about you. They may not approve, but remember, you'll be an adult in time, and you can practice how you see fit then. You're under their roof, and therefore subject to their rules - you can keep the peace without giving up your beliefs.

So what now? Your parents won't let you burn candles or incense in the house, you're too young to legally purchase an athame, and setting up an altar in the middle of your room might be a little too obvious. You can still have an altar and perform ritual, it just might not be as flashy as you'd like. Some innocuous items that you can use to represent the elements would be a feather for air, a sea shell for water, a pretty stone for earth, and perhaps a burnt wood chip, or a salamander figurine, or the like, for fire. You can just arrange these on a night stand or bookshelf, and nobody will even know the difference.

I'd advise you against acquiring an athame, or any sort of ritual knife, for many reasons. One, with all the school violence, having a knife in your possession, however small and innocent, can mean major trouble for you. Also, even if you don't get in legal trouble, having your parents see you with a sharp, pointy object can send the wrong message about Wicca. An alternative may be a ceramic athame, or you can do without.

A wand, however, is easy to acquire. Just go for a walk in the woods or the park, and find a suitable stick. If you'd like, and have the resources, you can sand and stain it, and tuck it up under the box-springs of your bed when you're not using it. Many tools are easy to make or acquire, even with a limited cash flow. Just check out the Thrifty Witch section if you're stuck for ideas. Just remember, the more tools you have, the harder it will be to hide the fact that you're Wiccan. If you have nosy brothers and sisters, it's best to keep ritual tools to a minimum. And like I said on the Ritual Tools page, all that's required for magick is will and focus, no fancy frills necessary.

Another good survival tip is to lay off the all-black. It can get depressing after a while, even if black does go with anything. If you want to wear clothing that expresses your faith, why not go with a white, red, and black motif, to honor the Maiden, Mother, and Crone aspects of the Goddess? Or wear a special color to honor the Sabbats, or the season. If you like jewelry, you don't have to wear a pentacle the size of a bus to proclaim your faith. You could go with a nice Celtic knotwork amulet, a fairy, a dragon, or something equally symbolic to you, that doesn't instantly proclaim your faith to the world. The key here is to keep a low profile and still be witchy too.

Bright Blessings to you on your chosen path, and may it not just be a "phase".